2,000, it will be Jewish year 5,760. Chinese year 4,697 will

bring the year of the dragon. In Islamic countries, it will be

1,421. And among Zoroastrians, it will be year 2,390. Should

we really be afraid of this particular New Year's Eve among

these deliciously non-round numbers? I think not... ^v^

Dear Cassius,

Are you still working on the Y-zero-K problem? This

change from BC to AD is giving us a lot of headaches

and we haven't much time left. I don't know how people

will cope with working the wrong way around. Having

been working happily downwards forever, now we have

to start thinking upwards. You would think that someone

would have thought of it earlier and not left it to us to

sort it all out at this last minute.

I spoke to Agustus Caesar the other evening. He was

livid that Julius hadn't done something about it when he

was sorting out the calendar. He said he could see why

Brutus turned nasty. We called in the consulting

astrologers, but they simply said that continuing

downwards using minus BC won't work. As usual, the

consultants charged a fortune for doing nothing useful.

As for myself, I just can't see the sand in an hour glass

flowing upwards. We have heard that there are three wise

men in the East who have been working on the problem,

but unfortunately they won't arrive until it's all over. Some

say the world will cease to exist at the moment of

transition. Anyway we are still continuing to work on this

blasted Y-zero-K problem, and I will send you a

parchment if anything further develops.

I fear that even if we solve this problem, the Y1K problem

could cause the Dark Ages in a thousand years.

Vale. Plutonius

Boris Yeltsen, Bill Clinton, and Bill Gates were

invited to have dinner with G-d.

During dinner, G-d said, "I need the three most

important people on Earth to deliver my message.

Tomorrow, I will destroy the earth."

Yeltsin immediately called together his cabinet and

said, "I have two bad new items for you. G-d does

exist, and tomorrow He will destroy the Earth."

Clinton called an emergency meeting of Congress

and said, "I have good news and bad news. The

good news is that G-d does exist; the bad news is

that tomorrow he is going to destroy the Earth."

Bill Gates went back to Microsoft, called a meeting

of all his employees and said,

"I have two fantastic announcements I am one of

the three most important people on Earth,and the