The Magic of Joke du Jour  Archives


Joke du Jour (tm) Set 1. Volume 13; Issue 6.  Jan 6, 1999 


1hawk.gif (1597 bytes) You know you're getting old when you need glasses....
to find your teeth! 

LadyHawke
*~*~*~*~*~*

1hawk.gif (1597 bytes) "Do You Remember?"

Grandpa and Grandpa were sitting in their porch
rockers watching the beautiful sunset and
reminiscing about "the good old days," when
Grandma turned to Grandpa and said, "Honey,
do you remember when we first started dating and
you used to just casually reach over and take my
hand?" Grandpa looked over at her, smiled and
obligingly took her aged hand in his.

With a wry little smile, Grandma pressed a little
farther, "Honey, do you remember how after we
were engaged, you'd sometimes lean over and
suddenly kiss me on the cheek?"  Grandpa leaned
slowly toward Grandma and gave her a lingering
kiss on her wrinkled cheek.

Growing bolder still, Grandma said, "Honey, do
you remember how, after we were first married,
you'd kind of nibble on my ear?" Grandpa slowly
got up from his rocker and headed into the house.
Alarmed, Grandma said, "Honey, where are you
going?"

Grandpa replied, "To get my teeth!"

1hawk.gif (1597 bytes) "An Urgent Doctor's Visit"

A Doctor recently had a patient "drop" in on
him for an unscheduled appointment.  "What
can I do for you today?" the Doctor asked.

The aged Gentleman replied:  "Doctor, you must
help me.  Every time I make love to my wife, my
eyes get all bleary, my legs go weak, I can hardly
catch my breath....  Doctor, I'm scarred!!!"
 
The Doctor, looking at his 86 year old patient,
said: "Mr. ----, these sensations tend to happen
over time, especially to a man of your advanced
years, but tell me, when did you first notice these
symptoms?"

The old gent's response was:

"Well... three times last night, and twice again this
morning!"

 

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