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"Dividing The Nuts"

There was a huge nut tree by the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts.  "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for  me," said one boy.  The bucket was so full, several rolled out towards the fence.

Cycling down the road by the cemetery was a third boy. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you." He knew what it was. "Oh, my G-d!" he shuddered, "It's Satan and St. Peter dividing the souls at the cemetery!"

He cycled down the road and found an old man with a cane, hobbling along. "Come quick!" he said, "You won't believe what I heard. Satan and St. Peter are down at the cemetery dividing the souls." The old man said, "Shoo, you brat! Can't you see I'm finding it hard to walk as it is!"

After several pleas, the man hobbled to the cemetery and heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one..."  The old man whispered, "Boy, you've been telling' the truth! Let's see if we can see the Devil himself."  Shivering with fear, they edged toward the fence, still unable to see anything, but they heard, "One for you, one for me.  One for you, one for me.  And one last one for you. That's all.  Let's go get those nuts by the fence, and we'll be done."

They say the old guy made it to town 10 minutes before the boy!