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“Things Not To Say To A Cop When He Pulls You Over"

Part I

 

  • I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
  • Sorry officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
  • Aren't you the guy from the village people?
  • Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me,   good job.
  • I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.
  • I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
  • You're not going to check the trunk, are you?
  • Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.
  • Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on COPS?
  • Wow, you look just like the guy in the picture on my   girlfriend's night stand.
  • Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?
  • I pay your salary.
  • So uh, you on the take or what?
  • Gee officer, that's terrific.  The last officer only gave me a warning.
  • Do you know why you pulled me over?  Okay, just so one   of us does.
  • I was trying to keep up with traffic.  Yes, I know there are no other cars around, that's how far they are ahead of me.

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