Jewish Humor

Jewish Risque Humor

Kid Jokes

You Know You're...

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"You Know You're A Dog Person When..." 

You and the dog come down with something like flu on the same day.  Your dog sees the vet while you settle for an over-the-counter remedy from the drugstore. 

Your dog is getting old and arthritic, so you go buy lumber and build her a small staircase so she can climb onto the bed by herself. 

Your license plate or license plate frame mentions your dog. 

You match your furniture/carpet/clothes to your dog. 

You have your dog's picture on your office desk (but no one else's). 

You lecture people on responsible dog ownership every chance you get. 

You hang around the dog section of your local bookstore. 

You skip breakfast so you can walk your dog in the morning before work. 

You are the only idiot walking in the pouring rain because your dog needs her walk. 

You don't go to happy hours with coworkers any more because you need to go home and see your dog. 

Your parents refer to your pet as their granddog. 

Your weekend activities are planned around taking your dog for a hike (both days). 

You keep an extra water dish in your second-floor bedroom, in case your dog gets thirsty at night (after all, her other dish is way down on the first floor...). 

Your freezer contains more dog bones than anything else. 

You never completely finish a piece of steak or chicken (so your dog gets a taste, too). 

You shovel a zig-zag path in the back yard snow so your dog can reach all her favorite spots. 

You avoid vacuuming the house as long as possible because your dog is afraid of the vacuum cleaner. 

You keep eating even after finding a dog hair in your pasta. 

You make popcorn just to play catch with your dog. 

You carry pictures of your dog in your wallet instead of pictures of your parents, siblings, significant other, or anyone else remotely human. 

And the number one reason you know you're a dog person:  Your dog is the star of your World Wide Web site!