"An Ultimate M&M Challenge"
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the
strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To
this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two
candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until
one of them cracks and splinters. That is the
"loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately.
The winner gets to go another round.
I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and
the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I
have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense
theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is
misshapen, or pointer, or flatter than the rest. Almost
invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy
extra strength. In this way, the species
continues to adapt to its environment. When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with
one M&M, the strongest of the herd.
Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an
envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503
USA, along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding
purposes." This week they wrote back to
thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand
tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will
discover the True Champion.
There can be only one...
Have a website? PLEASE, paste this code in the HTML of your website to link to
us
— it's fast and easy! And it's the best way to let as many people as possible
know about cool funny jokes Joke du Jour has prepared for you!! Thanks!
<a
href="http://www.jokedujour.com/archive/archive.htm">Cool Funny
Jokes</a> |
|
|
