"Female
Bashing"
Women have more imagination than men do. They need it to
tell us how wonderful we are.
Women have their faults. Men have only two. Everything we
say. Everything we do.
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women
somehow deteriorate during the night.
When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping.
Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.
A man is a person who will pay two dollars for a one-dollar
item he wants. A woman will pay one dollar for a two-dollar item that she doesn't want.
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he
doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
Men always want to be a woman's first love. Women have a
more subtle instinct: What they like is to be a man's last romance.
A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks. A
woman loses hers after four kisses.
To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and
love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to
understand her at all.
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