“Airlines Tidbits“
FA: "Ladies and Gentlemen, as you are all now painfully aware, our
Captain has landed in Seattle. From all of us at United Airlines we'd like to thank you
for flying with us today and please be very careful as you open the overhead bins as you
may be killed by falling luggage that shifted
during our so called "touch down."
About 5 or 6 years ago I was on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo, Texas
on a particularly windy and bumpy day. I could tell during the final that the Captain
really had to fight it, and after an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant come on
the PA and announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo. Please remain in
your seats with your seat belt fastened while the Captain taxies what's left of our
airplane to the gate!"
Another flight Attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: We ask you
to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."
Upon landing hard, the pilot gets on the PA system, "Sorry folks for the
hard landing. It wasn't the pilot's fault, and it wasn't the plane's fault. It was the
asphalt."
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